Why do you procrastinate?

Happy Moment of the Week

Do you know what else I love? I love our ritual, our weekly ritual to share the Happy Moment of the Week. So, last week, I took an entire week off. Mihir had a fall break. My husband and I took a leave from our job for that entire week. I think it was my first long leave in a long time. It was the most relaxing week I ever had. I had all my podcast social media content already planned and scheduled. I had all my office work either taken care off or delegated. I did not open my social media or emails. We booked a nice air bnb for a couple of days and had an awesome family time. We ate soul food, did barbecue, played games. In all, we had a great bonding time. We came back on Thursday and then the entire Friday, Saturday and Sunday were still vacation days. What a feeling? I took naps after months. Just cuddled with kids watching Harry Potter without thinking about anything at all. I got my blank canvas for an entire week. I got time to think about new ideas for my podcast. I got time to reflect on my journey as a podcaster. I got time to have a long and hearty chat with Rushi without any tensions about work deadlines. I am still a little bit hungover from all the relaxation. Is that even a thing? Don’t know.. But yes I felt happy and calm the entire time. This was definitely a happy week for me.Not just one moment, the entire week was just awesome. What about you my friend? How was your week? Did you make any special memories this week? Just pause for a moment, and look intentionally, think about the moment that brought you joy, the moment that brought a smile on your face, just live that moment again. I would love to hear from you, about your happy moment. I would love to read your happy moment in our weekly post. Join my facebook group, Morning Cup of Sunshine community to share and to connect with the inspired and inspiring friends, just like you. I am sure you will love to be part of this group.

Alright, are you ready to dive into today’s topic? But before that, tell me one thing, has this happened to you? Consider you have the tallest pile of laundry that you have to fold. But you are just dreading to fold all this laundry. Consider you have a sink full of dirty dishes, but somehow you keep on doing some unnecessary small, irrelevant tasks instead of getting to those dirty dishes. Consider that you planned to work out in the evening after the work day is over, but instead of getting into your workout clothes, you keep on doing some totally unnecessary chores around the house. Have you ever thought about it? Why do you keep pushing the dreaded tasks away even when you know their importance? Why do you postpone or delay some tasks which you know are absolutely crucial? This is nothing but procrastination. What is procrastination? Procrastination is putting things off for someday and that someday is never today. You keep stalling things, delaying the things which can be done easily today. But you keep putting off for tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow. Each day comes only once and it is always a good day to do good things. But instead of working on your dreams, your goals, you keep pushing them away by giving some excuses. You start making easy things harder by delaying them and this is nothing but procrastination. Today, let’s work together to figure out why we procrastinate.

Reason 1 : Too afraid to try

Are you the type of the person who is too afraid to work on your dream because you are afraid of failures? Are you scared of failures? Are you worried about the obstacles which you might face? I always say, if your dreams are not scary then those dreams are not big enough. Have big, bold dreams and don’t be afraid to work on them even when you know, you might fail, even when you know the journey is difficult. Keep your eyes fixated on the end goal, keep imagining how you will feel once you achieve that big, bold dream. Everything you want is on the other side of the fear. It’s just you who has to take the first step. Let me tell you one story, it is a story of an incredible woman. She is the grandma of my very dear friend. My friend lives here in the USA. Last year, she invited her mom, dad and grandma to visit her here. They live in India. Her grandma is around 70 year old. She is very active and fit for her age. But, there was one big obstacle. Her grandma was too afraid to fly. She was too scared to even sit in an aeroplane. She wanted to see the USA and of course visit my friend but the plane trip was like a nightmare to her. She was scared of an idea to fly. She told my friend not to book her ticket as she won’t travel by plane. Grandma knew that she would enjoy her stay with her granddaughter and would love to see the USA but a plane ride was a bit too much to ask. After a lot of persuasion from my friend and her mom, dad, grandma took a leap of faith, she said yes to a plane ride. She was too scared even to enter the plane. She was extremely afraid when the plane took off and again when it landed. But the moment she saw my friend at the airport, she forgot all the fear, all the anxiety and only one thing she remembered was how incredibly happy she was to see my friend. In the next couple of months, she took several flights across the country and saw most of America, she travelled from East to West coast. She proudly showed all the photographs to me when they visited us briefly during their trip to New york. Before boarding her flight back to India, she thanked my friend to help her get over her fear and help her try to overcome her fear of planes. If she can do it at the age of 70, you can do it too. If she can overcome her lifelong fear to fulfill her dream to see America, you can overcome your fear to get closer to your goal. Good things come when you break the barriers, when you step out of your comfort zone. Don’t be afraid to fail, don’t be afraid to make mistakes. The biggest mistake that you make is when you don’t even try. Failure is nothing but another building block, it is just a stepping stone , it is just a step that takes you closer to your goal. Don’t stall things, don’t procrastinate just because you are afraid. Have you heard the quote by Albert Einstein, “A person who has never made a mistake, never really tried anything new.” New and exciting things are waiting for you on the other side of the door, just be bold to take the step forward and open that door without any fear. Today, not tomorrow, not some other day but open that door today, your bright and beautiful future is waiting just for you.

Reason 2 - Too perfect to start

I am surely guilty of this one. I have mentioned it many times, I am a recovering perfectionist. I always wanted everything to be just perfect, a perfectly clean house, a perfectly prepared dish, a perfectly developed application code and what not, the list is endless. This perfection was imbibed in me since childhood. I remember crying my eyes out after getting one maths problem wrong in one of my exams. One problem ! I am not kidding, this was me for a long time. I used to think this habit of perfection is making me work hard and I am becoming a better version of myself everyday. Of course isn’t that the goal? But oh my god, how wrong was I? I was no way near my better version. I was just becoming an unhappy version myself. I was never satisfied with my progress, there was always something wrong,there was some small, petty mistake that felt like the big, bold mark on my progress. Do you know what happened next? I started becoming afraid of even trying new things, as I thought I need to be perfect to even start that new thing. I was not ready to accept that there will be a learning curve, there will be some failures along the way. Then, I started postponing all new exciting things that I wanted to try but I was not perfect at. But then, I did not have courage to start anything new, exciting. It was all routine and known activities day in day out. I remember that time I used to take a strength training class at my local gym. For a few days, my instructor was pushing me to lift heavy. She was motivating me to pick up that 15lb weight but I was skeptical. I thought I could not complete an entire set with those 15lb weights, keeping a perfect form. I was too proud to pick up lighter weights in between the set if I failed to complete that set with 15 lbs. The result of this was I never picked up that 15 lbs, I never even tried. But one day, when I was doing those shoulder presses with 8 lbs, my instructor came and took those 8 lbs weight away from me and instead handed me those big 15 lbs. I had no choice but to hold them and start working out. I started doing shoulder presses with those heavy weights. It was difficult. I barely finished the set and instantly dropped the weights and switched over to lighter weights for the next round. But then next time, I picked up both 15lbs and 8 lbs. I started with heavy weights and then switched to lighter weights when I could not go with those heavy ones without hesitation. I was no longer afraid to start even when I knew that I might not be perfect. Perfection is just an illusion. All or nothing mindset never helps anyone to succeed in the long run. Instead let go of mistakes, don’t dwell over the past and work hard. If you are not better at something today, then you will be better at that tomorrow but you have to start. If you don’t even start working on your dream how will you get better at it?

Reason 3 - Too overwhelmed to focus

Are you laser focussed towards your goal? Are you completely focussed on one and only big, bold dream at the same time? I have a friend, she is always busy. She is always busy running around the errands, checking off many tasks but procrastinating the significant task. She wanted to start her career as a copywriter. She always had passion for writing and had a degree to support her passion. But she never really took action to advance her career. She keeps filling her day with mundane tasks. She is busy, all day every day but none of the activities actually bring her closer to her dream. I am not saying she should run away from her responsibilities but she should find a way to dedicate some time to work towards her goal every single day. If you are too overwhelmed with your to do list, how will you find time to think, process and progress towards your goal. I know this first hand. I used to be like that, always busy, always running around frantically from one task to another without taking a break, without stopping to actually think what is that I really want from life? I talk a lot about goals and big dreams in my podcast. You might think is it really that necessary to have a big goal in life. I want to clarify one thing today, when I say a goal, it can be anything, your goal could be as simple as learning a new recipe every month or as complex as starting your own business. I want you to see dreams and take inspired actions to achieve those dreams. But if you fill your day with totally irrelevants tasks that don’t move the needle towards your goal, then what is the use of all those busy days? Just take a few seconds and think about it. Are you able to think clearly about what you want from life? Are you left with enough energy to work on your dream after running around fulfilling your completely irrelevant to-do list? Do you have enough gas left in you to take a leap towards your goal? If you want to achieve something, you need to break that into smaller tasks and take laser focussed actions on those tasks. You might have to say no to something in order to fulfill your commitment towards your dream life. I have an entire episode to help you understand the ways to say no. When you say no to something irrelevant you are saying yes to something extremely relevant. So scan your to-do list, check if you are focussed enough towards your goal. No matter where you started, no matter how full your plate is already, focus on your purpose, your goal, don’t look anywhere else, just take inspired actions and move forward.

Reason 4 - Too Lazy to take action

This is my favorite one. I have a goal to workout, I am focussed and I have allocated dedicated time to work out but, I keep picking up totally unnecessary chores, or start finding totally irrelevant excuses instead of getting on that elliptical. Am I afraid to fail? No, Do I want to be perfect? Not really. Am I focussed mentally on that goal? Absolutely. Then what is wrong? I am nothing but lazy. Lazy to start my workout. I know the importance of a workout. I absolutely know how good I feel after the workout. I love to workout, but I just don’t feel like doing it today, right now.. How many of you have given such excuses? How many times did you hit the snooze button for your 5.00 am alarm and sleep for an extra hour or two? How many times did you procrastinate simple things such as filling gas in your car just because it’s an extra quarter mile ride? Are you one of those people who wait till December 20 to send Christmas cards because you don’t feel like going to the post office? Do you wait till the last minute to shop for a gift to bring to an upcoming birthday party? Don’t worry, there are millions like you. There is no easy way to say this. Time for some tough love, the only solution to get over this lazy attitude is just get up and get going, take an inspired action. Every day has its own purpose, every moment has its own purpose. We definitely need a few moments to relax and unwind but we also need moments where you work hard, dedicatedly and give your 100%. Laziness holds you back from achieving great goals, it limits your ambitions. You absolutely need rest, I understand but first wor hard to get tired so that you can rest. What is the point of resting before even getting tired?

Laziness is like instant gratification, it looks lucrative in the moment but it can never be compared with the satisfaction that you get after working hard and accomplishing something. Laziness, procrastinating looks good till you are really drowning under the pressure of deadlines. I read it somewhere, Procrastination is like a credit card, it is all shiny and glamorous till you get the bill. Now, you decide, if you want to take actions on time and actually enjoy the process or just wait for it to pile on and then drown yourself in stress.

Recap

On this note, let’s recap this episode. Today, I brought you a topic that you have experienced first hand at least a few times in your life. I elaborated on the reasons why do we procrastinate and how to work on these reasons.

Reason 1 - Too afraid to try

Reason 2 - Too perfect to start

Reason 3 - Too overwhelmed to focus

Reason 4 - Too lazy to take action

Today, go through your day more intentionally and see if you are taking inspired actions that move you closer to your goal. Do you work on yourself today or just plan for it tomorrow? Tomorrow is like mystical land where we all try to find the inspiration, motivation but after listening to this episode, get your inspiration today. Today is the day that you should make count. As Abraham Lincoln said, “You can not escape the responsibility from tomorrow by evading it today.” Just remember, “Success is not obtained overnight. It comes in installments; you get a little bit today, a little bit tomorrow until the whole package is given out. The day you procrastinate, you lose that day's success.”